It is so easy to be consumed with the busy-ness of each day that we fail to see just how far we have come. For me, the ending of this school year signified the ending of a major battle. Sure, it was a school year filled with challenges, but the biggest battle has been with...ME!
I seem to have this constant internal struggle going on: Am I doing all the right things? Should I have done more? If only I had... Next time, I am going to... And then there is the inexhaustible to-do list that is constantly on my mind. Whew! Just typing it out is exhausting!
Well, yesterday, I received several photo proofs from the girls' recent photo session. One picture in particular stopped me in my tracks. In it, the girls were jumping and appeared to be floating in air. Such a simple photo, but I immediately tried to remember what it felt like to be so free and unencumbered. Then I realized that the only thing that has been keeping me from that feeling of freedom is me. By whose order do I have to have every single little thing done by the end of the day? These deadlines are self-imposed. Sure, there are some things that have very real deadlines that have to be met, but most of the things I pressure myself down with are things that can be done tomorrow, the next day, or the next week. How liberating a feeling when you "get" something that is so simple, yet it has eluded you for so long!
As I sat poolside, watching my girls and looking at the pictures for the thousandth time that day, I realized just how easy it really is to lay aside the weights of my life and embrace the freedom I have to really, truly LIVE the best life ever. I am not too busy to take that trip or enter that doctoral program, or even to find love that doesn't require settling...
Before long, I started hearing Mary J. singing "Work That" in my head and I began humming along. Life is good, y'all; but it is about to get So.Much.Better.
To be continued...
