Today is my twins' fourth birthday. It is hard to believe that the two little ones who were born so small are already on their way to becoming big girls! I feel as if we somehow skipped a couple of years along the way. Before long, they will be skipping down the hallways at school as kindergartners.
I remember the day I gave birth to them like it was yesterday. I had gone in to see my high risk OB for a routine doctor's appointment and was told that they would be delivered that day because one appeared to be in trouble. I was so scared! When the doctor stepped out to call my regular OB to inform him that I needed to be delivered ASAP, I frantically called my husband at work to tell him to get there quickly.
Within an hour, I was given an epidural and was in the operating room. Greg barely made it and changed into scrubs. I had seen countless episodes of the birthing shows on Discovery Health and knew what the surgery would entail, and I remember wanting to see it through the mirror, although I figured Greg would have objected. (Of course, later, he got to stand up and see it and I missed it all. I felt so cheated!
Anyway, Dr. Martin took out Baby A (Lia). He quickly held her up over the sheet for me to see before passing her off to one of the two NICU teams waiting to work on our preemies. Man, she was tiny! How could she possibly have been the larger twin? There had to have been some sort of mistake! That was all I could think about. Next, Tootie was taken out, but Dr. Martin didn't hold her up. He just immediately handed her off and they went to work. Baby B was the one who had been in trouble on the ultrasound! I didn't know what was wrong, but I figured it had to be something since they didn't let me see her. I heard faint cries that sounded so far off into the distance.
After a few minutes they brought the babies to me to see, but I was too afraid to touch them. I just stared at them, trying to engrave their faces on my heart. I gave them both light kisses before they, and Greg, were whisked away to the NICU and I was, once again, left alone.
A short time later, Greg returned from the NICU and told me the vitals. I couldn't believe it! The high risk OB had estimated Lia to weigh 4lbs, 3oz, but she only really weighed 3lbs, 4oz and was 16 1/2 inches long. He estimated Tootie to be 3lbs, 9oz, but she was the runt of the litter weighing in at 2lbs, 14oz and 16 inches long. Was I ever glad that I had my doctor's appointment that day! They had been in more trouble than anyone really knew.
Miraculously, neither required a respirator. They breathed on their own from the start and stayed in the NICU only to learn to feed from a bottle and grow. They thrived and shattered any of the doctors' expectations. Instead of 6 weeks in the NICU as estimated, they came home together in 20 days tilting the scales at 4lbs, 5oz and 3lbs, 8 oz respectively. (I really think kangaroo care was the key).
When we got home, no one wanted to hold poor little Tootie at first because she was sooo small. She was the feisty one, though, who used to slap the hands of the nurses she didn't like whenever they tried to touch her... yeah, that was at ONE day old! We laughed at her because she kept those fist balled up so tightly as if she were in fight mode all the time! LOL! She also looked a little funny because she was so small that one skull plate sat slightly on top of the other since her head was so little. By the time she was six weeks old, though, it was right! She might've been mean to some of the nurses, but she loved her mama and relaxed so much while resting skin to skin with me for hours at a time. Gosh, how I miss that time!
Lia, on the other hand, was a sweet little cuddler. She would keep this little smile on her face the whole time we did kangaroo care. Who would have known that she'd grow to be so fiercely protective of her little sister (by 4 minutes!)? Who would've known how bossy that sweet little baby would turn out to be! LOL. (Actually, in life, that is known as having LEADERSHIP qualities!)
Over these past four years, I have been so amazed at how smart my girls are in addition to their beauty (obviously!). These little miracles so often reflect the love of God in our lives, and I am eternally thankful for them.
I look forward to seeing the young ladies they will ultimately become. Where will they go to school? What will their careers choices be? Who will they someday marry? What will be their passions in life? I sit awake at night sometimes thinking about them, and other times I tiptoe into their room trying to steal just one more glance, etching just one more memory of them into my brain. I just can't wait to see the plan God has for their lives. Somehow, I know HIS plans for them are big ones.
Girls, you are too young to even read this right now, but know that Mommy loves you. In fact, Mommy loved the hope of you she carried (for twelve years!) until the blessing of you was made manifest. I have loved you for a long, long time, my sweet ones, and I will love you forever.
Happy Birthday, My Miracle Princesses!
Love,
Mommy
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